One Writer's Motives

It's here.

One Writer's Motives

“You have to be hungry to be a good moonlighter.”

Those words still ring in my ears. Spoken by a fellow moonlighter, a man with a family of eight mouths to feed, they were heartfelt words, and true. I suppose I should have known then, if he’s moonlighting and hungry then it might be a good idea to avoid his occupation. I didn’t.

More than fifty years later, I’m retired and looking to re-enter the workforce, as...anything. I look far more like the man in the picture than I’d like to admit.

I live near the entrance to a country club, where the wealthy stop to drop off their unwanted pets. They find their way to my tractor shed, my back porch, to my shop, and they hole up against the cold. And I feed them, taking some of them in. Mostly they are cats, with the occasional aging dog among them.

If you are voting for Biden, you are comfortable, probably one such as would drop off an animal. If you are not, then you will not. Simple as that.

Generally speaking, it is my opinion that people are fairly unconcerned about other people. In explaining that to my young son, many years ago, who had been struck by the fact, I said, "People care about what happens to you just about as much as you care about what happens to them."

His response was almost instantaneous: "Whoa. That's, like, not at all."

It was simple, plain and honest. I have surmised that it is part of the human condition. I have been criticized for saying I'm not proud to be human, but in fact, I'm not. That's not the same as being ashamed, although sometimes, that description might be a better fit.

If we were better stewards of all that we've been afforded, of course we would all be better off. So would every creature, every plant, and the planet in general. Our comparatively high level of intelligence, not to mention our opposable thumbs, came with a high level of responsibility.

Instead of assuming it, we're more interested in the sale at the department store in the mall, or the new power tool we don't have yet. We obsess over style, coolness and belonging, and waste money on various wants while some of us still go hungry. We put on wrinkle cream, expecting it to hide two of our three chins. We fret about the irresponsibility of youths that we raised ourselves, as if it was their doing. We dismiss warnings of a potentially dying planet, then drive on to work and forget about it. Human trafficking, slavery and starvation still exist. Some of us murder our own people in the streets. Uneducated, starving masses swarm to kill people they know nothing about for reasons they do not understand. Disease flourishes and spreads, and we make money while attending to it. Why cure it?

And very few care about the rest of the animal kingdom. To me that's the worst part. Defenseless and innocent in our world, they are the most needful, and are at the same time the most likely to be abused. Habitats are destroyed to benefit relatively few humans. We feel we have no connection to that. But we do, because we are aware, and nevertheless, let it happen.

All of which is not to say that I am any better at all. I also hear the warnings. I am aware of the problems we face as a species. I see things that could be done that aren't even being considered. I see money being taken to attend to some of the problems that never arrives at any point that happens to be anywhere near those problems. I see the careless ways we live. I also went to work and largely forgot about it during my daily pursuits.

It doesn't have to be this way, for any of us. It is, because of what we as a whole are willing to accept. It has occurred to me, that toward the slow awakening that must occur, if I eventually manage to write well enough, I might at least become an ingredient in the catalyst that begins the necessary reaction. Necessary, that is, if we are to survive at all. Never mind having success as a species that has survived well. It's already too late for that.

So sometimes people ask me why I write. Well, I suppose much of it is self-expression. Most often, it's for release. Occasionally, it's actually for fun.

But the rest of what I have written, I have written for a reason. My words tell you who, and what I am. In many ways, I am exactly like you, no matter who it is you happen to be.

I am the hero.

I am also, the villain.

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